#1 Thing You Need to Prepare for as a New Mom

#1 Thing You Need to Prepare for as a New Mom

Hey Mommy,

I am so glad you are here today. I imagine that you are a new or expecting Mama hoping to be prepared in every way. But there is one important thing you may not be prepared for. Why? Because it’s rarely discussed. In my experience as a new mother myself, this was the #1 thing I wish I had known about. It was one thing I was NOT prepared for:

mental……chaos.

I was not prepared for the level of mental chaos motherhood created within me. The amount of love I have for my children in itself is exhausting.

When my son cries, I can feel it in my bones.

When he laughs, I can’t help but giggle with him.

When he reaches even the smallest new milestone I feel immensely proud.

As a first time mommy, I became obsessed with feeding schedules, sleeping schedules, diaper changes, next milestones. Is his poop supposed to be this color? Is he too cold? Is he overheating? Is he gaining enough weight?

And the hardest question of all:
Am I enough? 

I am the person that turns the wrong burner on and cooks nothing for 20 minutes.

I am the person who can’t keep a palm tree alive that only requires water once a week.

I once even lost my phone while I was talking on it.

And now here is God trusting me with the well being of not just one but two precious souls.

 

 

All of these mommy blogs and mommy forums set me up to believe that motherhood would come naturally for me, but it didn’t.

I read over and over again about the importance of breastfeeding exclusively the first year, sleep schedules, …again with the milestones. And do you know what this did for me? The information found online is contradicting and overwhelming. And I let it feed my fears.

How do you prepare for this?

It put me on edge. I couldn’t sleep. I had no real appetite. I was short with my husband. And I wasn’t taking care of myself.

I spent my days wandering around our home wearing my shirt soggy with milk, bags under my eyes, hair a mess, sleep deprived and overwhelmed from obsessing over useless contradicting information. I seriously questioned if I was good enough.

Am I really cut out for this role?

And through all of this, I could say that if you are not sure if you want to have kids, or on the fence about it- don’t do it.

But I won’t say it.

I couldn’t possibly say it. Because after all of it, even on our worst days, the unconditional love between mother and child makes the whole mess of new motherhood so worth it.

Do you want my advice, Mama?

How do you find peace and go from a sleep deprived nightmare to enjoying every second with those sweet babies? How do you skip over the milk zombie scene I described above?

My answer will seem harsh. It’s going to sting a little bit.

My answer is the sooner you accept that this is your life now, the sooner you will be able to truly enjoy it.

Just embrace it.

Quit fighting it with memories of how your life was before children. Push pause on your memories of nights out with your friends, lazy Sunday’s spent sleeping in, and your freedom. Stop with the fantasy of how “life is supposed to be.”

This is it. This is your life now. This is motherhood. And you will get back to all those other things in time. For now, put on a clean shirt, snuggle up with those sweet babies… and just embrace motherhood in all its chaos.

With Love, Kelly Travis

 

 

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Kelly Travis

3 COMMENTS

  1. Andrea | 13th Aug 17

    So true! None of us are prepared! As the mom to a 12 year old & a 4 year old, I can assure you that this will calm down. 🙂 You will go back to fixing your hair & doing your makeup everyday (and even wearing clean clothes!). And I like your last point – just realize that this is life right now and that’s ok. You’re raising a person & that’s pretty awesome and exhausting. 🙂

    • kmtravis | 14th Aug 17

      Yes, thank you, Andrea! It’s good for new mothers to know that NONE of us are prepared and that we aren’t alone in feeling that way. I am relieved to know it will all calm down with time! Thanks for visiting my site 🙂

      • Andrea | 14th Aug 17

        you bet! Having mine spaced so far apart has been kind of nice to give me some perspective. 🙂

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